But a lot of you know it’s really been 18 years, although we got married “only” 8 years ago today in Hawaii. (mmmm…how many of you want to be in Hawaii right about now?).
18 years is a long time to know someone, so if I could talk to my former self knowing what I know now, what would I say?
It’s ok to fight once in awhile. It’s healthy, even.
Take some pictures, damn it! You’ll wish you had them to look back on when you were both long-haired youths. Also, don’t keep Mark’s hair for months after he cuts it. It’s sorta creepy even if you are superstitious about someone making a voodoo doll out of the hair or whatever you were worried about.
Your 24 year old problems aren’t that bad so stop worrying and being so grumpy about it. Because you’re going to have some real problems when you’re an adult and you’re going to have to learn how to cope and deal with it. Start learning how now.
Don’t nag so much. You’re just lucky he’s not the type to complain about the nagging.
Travel more. Go overseas to Asia. Because once you start having kids and your own business, you’re not really going to have the chance to travel much again.
Sleep. Sleep now while you can.
Don’t wait till you’re 30 to start saving money. That was real stupid to wait so long because you could have had more money in the bank at age 40 if you started saving when you got your first job out of college.
Talk to each other. Don’t just make major decisions about your life on your own (like moving back to NY) and then just announce them. Make decisions together.
Don’t waste your time wondering if he’ll ever go bald or develop a beer gut and become one of those skinny fat people. He won’t.
Even though your small Hawaii wedding was relatively cheap, don’t spend 3k on your wedding dress, even if your aunt was generous enough to pay for it as a gift. Because your brother is going to step on it and rip it right after the reception and you’re just going to hang it up at your parent’s house and never look at it again. Spend the money elsewhere or save it.
It doesn’t really matter that you think you have little in common in terms of pop culture references. So what if he can’t recall any episode of the Brady Bunch or share how the deep lyrics of Morrissey or Robert Smith saved you in high school or get any quotable references of any John Hughes movie. That stuff doesn’t matter later on and it won’t play a factor in any major life decisions that need to be made.
Don’t worry so much about any lack of ambition that you might think he has. Because he’s going to prove that he’s a harder worker than anyone you know and you’ll discover that actually, of the 2 of you, you’re the lazier one.
Don’t question whether or not you’re making the right choice. You won’t be rich and have a country house and you won’t ever get to be a stay-at-home mom, but you’ll have a nice life and 2 of the cutest and smartest kids you’ll ever meet. Money is not everything.
We’re not really big on gifts and stuff on anniversaries, so we’re just all going out for a family sushi meal. The weekend has been given over to Etsy orders anyway, but things are actually quite calm and manageable. Oh, and this goofy picture? Mark and I can’t take a good photo of ourselves if our life depended on it. I had considered it for our Etsy feature, but decided last minute to use the one with Claudine just because it makes me laugh. Also, I am standing on a box. Mark is 6’3″ and I am 5’6″. Just in case you were wondering…