Have you ever woken up one day and realized that you hadn’t seen any friends in a long time? I can be one of those people who can easily stay inside the house for a few days without getting cabin fever. The girls can do this too. We’ve spent whole weekends inside just putzing around the house. Maybe we’re homebodies. Or hermits. Or maybe we’re just too absorbed in whatever we’re doing at the time…you know, like drawing complex mazes up mountain tops or really over working to death that design for a client (oh, you want 2 directions for that cover? Well here, let me give you 8). Thank god we live across the street from a playground and have friendly neighbors or we might never get out (just kidding). It’s funny when I think back to when the girls were babies because I was so much more diligent about getting out every single day, going to bookstores, taking walks with the stroller, going to playgrounds and playdates. I mean, they were babies; they probably didn’t care where they were, but I suppose those kinds of scheduled activities are more for the parents to maybe save your sanity and cobble together some semblance of anything that resembles a social life. But now, that sort of pressure to go out every single day is gone. We like being at home.
I realized today that this has been a really non-social summer so far since school’s been out. Other than hanging out with Anna twice, a few playdates for the girls, and one backyard party, I haven’t really seen many other friends at all other than some run ins with the neighbors or at camp drop off. No outdoor summer roof parties, no drinks on a breezy summer evening, no dinner at restaurants or a girls night out. Pretty sad. Or is it?
One of the positives of getting older is just being comfortable with who you’ve become. No pressure, no judgement. It’s not about being anti-social or boring or introverted. It’s about settling into yourself and acknowledging that it’s okay to want to spend time alone, even if it’s a lot of time alone (also, when you’re a parent, you’re never really alone, are you?). I don’t need to go out constantly to feel secure in my friendships. I know that they are there. It hasn’t always been this way and maybe this just comes with time or age. Or maybe we leave some of the bullshit dramas of some friendships behind as we get older. It’s a great feeling to be able to reach out to people when I’m ready to hang out with a friend and know that we can make it happen.