It’s gotten worse. Bedtimes pushed to 2:30, 3am, sometimes even later. That schedule would be fine if, you know, I was 21 and I can sleep in, but I am up by 7:30 to get both girls dressed, fed, lunches made and out the door for the walk to school. Insomnia and work aside, I just have a hard time making myself go to sleep. I don’t want to go to bed, but I recognize that this is a problem, the avoidance of sleep. Nobody can really function 100% on 16 hours of sleep over 4 days. I’m surprised that I can function at all, but I can and that’s what makes it dangerous because I keep pushing to see how far I can go. But I can’t give it up. Night time, when the girls are in bed, even after Mark has turned in, is my time. And then I realize, that maybe this is about trying to have it both ways. To be a parent without sacrificing time for myself. To cram in as much work as I can, as if I were childless. Is there anybody else out there like me?