the spring and the rain

May 23, 2018 |  Category:   life

The cherry blossoms are long gone, but I couldn’t let a spring go without posting photos of their beauty here. Because they were beautiful, yes, but they were gone in a flash – even quicker than usual it seemed.

It’s been raining. A lot. You know, I like the rain and gloom and all, but I think I’m becoming one of those people who get negatively affected by weather when there are more than a few consecutive rainy days strung together. It’s also been bad for business. During outdoor market season, we watch the Sunday forecast like a hawk. The difference between a sunny day and a rainy day (or even a cloudy one) is the difference between a day of good sales and a bad one. This, in turn, determines how I budget for the week (more or less). Talk about hand to mouth! But it’s true. That $4 popsicle might just very well be the same $4 that I’ll give one of the girls for lunch money the next day. We’ve seen too many cool rainy days so far this market season though. The pattern has been like this almost every week since opening day in April: sunny and warm during the weekdays, then rain and a 15 degree drop in temperature by Sunday. It’s just random bad luck, but discouraging nonetheless when part of your livelihood depends on decent weather. Ten years in business and some of it never gets any easier.

In other (sort of related) news, farmer’s markets are finally showing some variety after months of what seemed like only apples and potatoes in the produce crates. Blackberries are appearing and they’ve generally been sweet, not tart. We’re keeping our eye out for ramps. In the meantime, we’ve been eating a lot of asparagus because that’s the vegetable that the kids favor above all these days. They eat asparagus because they love it, not because they have to.

These days I stare at the wall a lot, often with headphones listening to music. Music is still life, just as it was when I was a teenager clinging to song lyrics while trying to untangle my confused adolescent thoughts. Funny how this scenario feels oddly familiar except for the fact that I’m middle aged and (sometimes) listening to the same old songs. But they’re comforting, like being wrapped in a hug by an old familiar friend. What passes through my head while I’m off staring are a number of things: how to navigate parenting a teenager as she tries to makes sense of her confused adolescent life; pondering about how I feel “stuck”; searching for ways to get myself unstuck; what to eat for lunch; denial about how we’re entering the mid-point of 2018.

That last one; it kills me.

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  • Lauren May 25, 2018 at 9:52 am

    I work shiftwork and have those staring moments on quiet nights… time passes too quickly yet at the same time, I feel stuck in this life phase (working toward F.I.) when I really want to be in the next phase (because I want my time to completely be my own). But, I’m old enough to know the dangers of wishing time away.

  • Vanessa May 25, 2018 at 5:53 pm

    It doesn’t end, it just changes a little bit from day to day. I finally ran into a helpful quote a while back, “these obstacles were my life.” ALFRED D. SOUZA