There is nothing like discovering a special new-to-you place for the first time and tucking it away as a memory to pull out on days when things seem rocky. It was a cold Easter weekend when we took a spontaneous road trip to Boston. Didn’t think we’d be heading to the ocean on this trip, but my cousin must share a fondness for drives and views like I do because she suggested this park near Rockport, Massachusetts. I like the ocean in any form, but I like rocky, dramatic beachscapes the best.
We didn’t stay too long because of the wind and cold, but long enough to get our fill of ocean air. The waves were really rough that day. It’s funny how that works, isn’t it? The rockier the surf, the calmer the effect it has on you (well, at least on me). Miss C had decided to go off on her own (within our sight, of course) and climb the rocks to a spot where she sat herself down for quite awhile. “She’s having a moment”, we joked to ourselves as we watched her looking out to the ocean perched high on those rocks. When I finally got her attention and motioned for her to come back, I asked her what she was doing sitting on that rock for so long. Just listening to the waves, she said.
I always seem to find myself at the ocean before a major shift in life. It’s almost like a sign that I won’t realize until after the fact, and then I’ll connect the dots. Quite suddenly, I’m facing uncertainty and it’s something I haven’t felt in almost two years. It’s unsettling in its unfamiliarity because uncertainty seemed like a state that I previously was able to live with only because it was constant. Whatever the outcome, what I know now is that this year will be a year of change. Again.
Shouldn’t I realize by now that change is the thing that is constant? The answer is yes. Always. But I wouldn’t refuse a few years of boring stability. Wouldn’t that be nice! I’m not sure if I’ve ever really been a big believer of signs despite my earlier observations of my trips to the sea. I think I’ve always rejected signs because it seems like a passive way to make a decision, but I’m waiting for a sign right now – maybe even a few.